


to sleep

by Shinkirou



Category: Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Marvel Avengers Movies Universe, Thor (Movies), Thor - All Media Types
Genre: Community: cottoncandy_bingo, Daily December, Fluff, Implied Pseudo-Incest, Implied Relationships, M/M, Minor Cultural Mysogyny, Neck Rub, Prompt Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-01
Updated: 2012-12-01
Packaged: 2017-11-19 23:31:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/578830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinkirou/pseuds/Shinkirou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki is exhausted.</p>
            </blockquote>





	to sleep

The first thing Thor notices when he sees Loki for the first time in weeks at the feasting table is that Loki looks positively _exhausted_. There are darker-than-usual bags under his eyes, his posture isn't impeccable as usual, and he generally looks about ready to pass out into the food in front of him. Thankfully he doesn’t, and manages to look at least somewhat more alive when Frigga talks to him, but Thor can still practically feel the wariness radiating off of Loki’s lithe form.

He’d been away in Álfheimr along with Odin, dealing with the elves to help settle another trading agreement. Thor hadn’t been invited for obvious reasons (his lack of political ability and hot temper included), but Loki was surprised when Odin invited him. Thor was rather shocked, as well, to say the least – last either of them had heard, Loki was supposed to be staying in Ásgarðr until Odin saw fit to allow him leave. 

Thor had figured it would be a difficult negotiation, and so Odin’s bringing of Loki seemed wise, as Loki was well-known for having a silver tongue persuasive enough to talk down even the most formidable of opponents. Last Thor had heard, the negotiations had actually gone well – so well, in fact, that Odin, upon returning to Ásgarðr, decided to give Loki a few more duties here and there. Still nothing fitting his not-quite-restored-but-also-not-revoked princely status, but it was better than simply keeping him cooped up and letting his gift with seiðr and intelligence go to waste.

Only things had apparently quickly gotten out of hand, as more and more Ásgarðians became aware of the fact that the once-prince was now reduced to doing a woman’s work. More and more requests for trivial things came flooding in, and since Loki was the one who had to review all of these silly, pointless requests, he was quickly swamped with work. It wasn't difficult work, by any means, but time consuming, as he actually _did_ have to read all of them, lest there actually be something of import mixed in with all the blatantly useless requests. 

Eventually Odin had figured out what had been happening, and ordered guards to read over the requests before Loki touched them, and to punish anyone who was abusing the system. This did cut back on the sheer workload, but Thor knows better than anyone that Loki had been catching little sleep before hand, and near none the entire three months that this had been occurring.

When Loki has apparently had all he can take and moves to leave the table with a quiet word to Frigga, Thor instinctively stands to follow him. It is not difficult to stop Loki from slamming the door on him, in this state – in fact, Loki doesn't even try, apparently already having realized the same thing himself. Still, he gives Thor no words and collapses on his bed with no preamble, face buried in the pillows.

It’s even worse than Thor thought. Ordinarily Loki would not turn his back on Thor for a second – if Loki is too tired to even be paranoid, Thor realizes he’s let this go on far too long. 

He knows better than to try and talk to Loki in this state, and after checking that the door is locked behind them, Thor strides over to the bed, and Loki only rolls over to glare at him once he is sitting on the edge of it. 

“Loki, please, you know I would not hurt you.”

Loki rolls his eyes disdainfully, clearly implying that Thor already has, but says nothing. Thor sighs, hurt but unwilling to start a fight over this, particularly when Loki is already entirely fatigued, and so he simply drops a hand to Loki’s neck in a familiar gesture.

Loki visibly bristles, and looks like he wants to say something, so Thor squeezes just enough, applying just enough pressure to dig in and press against one of the surely painfully cramped muscles. Loki startles, just slightly, but quickly recovers his bland expression. 

The fact that it slipped at all in the first place has Thor even more worried. 

Still, Thor knows better than to think that this fixes anything between them – just because Loki is bone weary does not mean he has changed his opinion of Thor in the slightest. The fact that Loki hasn't shrugged him off or said anything biting and brutal doesn’t mean Thor’s forgiven. At best, this is a temporary truce; Loki is too tired to fight, and Thor certainly does not want to push that, would much rather allow this rare peace to flourish for as long as possible, the tentative quiet between them is more than Thor dared hope for, even as he followed Loki to his chambers. 

So Thor is careful, even as he moves his hand, slowly, across the pale expanse of Loki’s neck, brushing back thin black tendrils of hair as he comes across them. Loki doesn't move, doesn't speak – allows the touch, but shows not how he feels about it, one way or the other. Even if he were to, though, Thor would likely pay it little heed, save for if Loki looked angry. It is too hard to trust Loki’s expressions, or words – even what appear to be involuntary gestures can be twisted by Loki’s skilful mind and body until even the barest of twitches is serving his purpose. Still, Loki’s passivity unnerves him in its unfamiliarity, and so he is careful to go slow, and only presses harder every few seconds, rubbing Loki’s neck as he so often used to as a comforting gesture. 

Things were better between them, then. Even if Loki had not been truly happy during those days, almost anything would be better than the situation between them now. Once, a myriad of hurts could be brushed away with a simple apology; Thor longs for those times again. Now if he so much as glances at Loki wrong he is given a venomous glare, Loki’s poison green eyes cutting deeper than any sword could. After all, swords don’t cut as deep as betrayal and hatred. Thor would do almost anything to restore Loki to his side, or even just have them on friendly terms again, were it in his power to do so. 

Loki sighs abruptly and Thor has to clamp down harshly on the instinct to pull away. It was not a noise of discomfort or annoyance, but rather more long-suffering and defeated, like Loki knows what Thor is thinking. Neither speaks, but slowly Loki tilts his head against the pillows, giving Thor’s hand more room. Thor takes the gesture for what it is and moves his hand, fingers digging in harder to the incredibly tense muscle of Loki’s neck. Some part of Thor is still reeling from the fact that Loki has not yet blasted him across the room, but he is certainly not complaining. He knows if he had tried this even a month ago the response he received would have been much less pleasant. He knows that it is only because Loki is completely exhausted.

He wishes it wasn’t. 

But still, Thor will take whatever allowance he can get – perhaps by showing Loki that he can still trust Thor, that Thor still loves him, Loki will gradually let things grow peaceful between them again, if not back to the way things used to be. Thor rubs Loki’s neck until the kinks are unwound, and when he pulls away, Loki lays his cheek on the pillow and stares up at Thor from behind the fringe of his lashes. Neither says anything – even this tired, Thor was certainly not expecting to be thanked, but the fact that Loki’s emerald eyes are even slightly less guarded sends warmth through Thor’s body. It only lasts for a few scarce seconds, then Loki breaks the eye contact and rolls onto his side, showing his back to Thor, which, for all it is intended as a dismissive gesture, Thor is glad of. If Loki is showing Thor his back, it means that, at least for now, he is trusting Thor enough to not attack him. 

Thor stands quietly, and has to try hard to resist the temptation to press a kiss to Loki’s neck, or back, or anywhere he could, because he knows that _would_ get him blasted through the door faster than he would be able to comprehend. He might try pushing his luck and pulling the green woolen blanket over Loki’s somewhat relaxed form, but alas Loki is laying on top of it, and Thor certainly knows better than to pull it from under him when he is so complacent. As such, he leaves without any further words or interactions, pulling the door closed quietly behind him so as not to disturb his half-sleeping brother.

Things between them may never return to the way they used to be, but Thor wonders if he can’t work with what he’s being given. He knows it could take time – years, millennia even, Loki is one who can hold a grudge – but let it never be said that he will not try.

If he’s grinning like a fool while he walks, well, it’s been a while since he’s had such a challenge, let alone one with such rich potential. If all it takes is time and work, Thor will succeed. Once Loki is back at his side – never behind him, as Loki claims he was, before all the fighting and the hatred – Thor swears he will make Loki see just how loved he is, consequences be damned.

He falls asleep with the fine taste of hope on his tongue; when he dreams, his thoughts are brightly coloured and hopeful. Tomorrow, Loki will be back to acerbic and hateful, but Thor will be fuelled by the knowledge that there is even an infinitesimal part of Loki that still trusts him. After all, Thor is stubborn enough to keep trying until Loki gives in.

It’s a small chink in the armour now, but it will be enough. Thor falls asleep with a smile on his face.

**Author's Note:**

> prompt/bingo square was "neck rub".


End file.
